Imprinting
Impossibly small ducklings bob along on our lake only to disappear within a few hours. It’s an endless cycle. The birth and death of fuzzy innocents every few hours.
Momma duck with more than 15 ducklings
Yesterday, at a nearby preserve, a parade of juvenile ducks hurried past following a very proud mother. How she protected this ridiculously long line of ducklings was anyone’s guess. A miracle.
Imprinting.
In the year Nicholas died, 80k overdosed. Obviously, I’ve been thinking a lot about addiction and my role in helping others, and I'm hoping for a sign on how to make a difference. Our prisons are full of people struggling with addiction, as is our unhoused population. Rates of success for people after treatments for opioid addiction are beyond abysmal. Obviously, prohibition didn’t work, and legalizing hasn’t helped much either. The system is set up for rehabs and big pharma to win.
What is left for a mother when her child is gone? Should I try to ensure other kids don't overdose, and isn't the problem too big for one person?
Something that stayed with me this week is from a podcast called Fractiles of Change on the way we try to punish away addiction. https://open.spotify.com/episode/1K0tzjafBoQTLgX5sJEsHQ?si=OiI5WXOeR8u5PBD9vjak4w Sia Henry discussed the purpose of justice and what we have laws. Is the purpose of a rule to encourage people to do the right thing or solely to punish? She gave examples of how a volunteer-community approach worked, but the judge didn’t want to continue because this framework would render many of his staff obsolete.
Perhaps the free market approach to justice isn’t human-friendly. Or as Sia Henry said, “When we say we want that person held accountable, what we’re really saying is that we want punishment… revenge.”
The rehab industry, big pharma, and the justice system are all profitable. Profits over people. We treat addiction as a moral problem rather than trying something more humane and more effective. What would it look like if we treated addiction as a disease? One thing is for sure, when my son was in the ICU with swelling of the brain, they wouldn’t have discharged him back home as if their one role was to treat the symptoms and not the cause.
Yesterday, on the 24th of April, Wendy Duffy ended her life. She was a mother who couldn’t find a way to continue living without her son in the world. How do mothers continue living when their babies don’t? And do we as a society value human happiness over continuing doing things the way weve always beeing doing them? https://www.tiktok.com/@katie.rizzo007/video/7633093303663086879
I can keep hoping that the bond of motherhood doesn’t end at death. This week, I listened to a podcast by Kenadie’s Mom. She described how she communicates even beyond the veil. Contacting someone who is not alive is probably too much woo-woo for many. But I found it beautiful - it’s here on Unsilence Grief - https://www.youtube.com/live/1zH-bBNuTsQ?si=jgcuRbbJJFsJqtDH.
I had the honor of being interviewed on the podcast A Contagious Smile, I hope Nicholas would have been proud of the tribute I gave him. A Mother Remembers Her Son And Rebuilds Life After Opioid Loss with Katie Rizzo
Somehow, one momma duck found a way to help her own brood plus a few others. Those waddling teenagers got the gift of adulthood. I’m not sure how to take her example and follow.
Momma duck with 18+ babies
